The Bell Tolls for Thee

(Editor's note: the following is a piece I intended to submit to parenting magazines, but never quite got around to, so I thought I'd share it here. RPP editors take note: this is available for your 2008 Halloween issue!)

Calling all moms:

Greet your little monsters with some last-minute tricks and treats

Uh-oh. You thought you were going to be so ahead of the game by buying all your Halloween candy in advance, didn’t you? And now it’s 5 p.m. on October 31 and that big bag of Fun-Size Snickers that was intended for the neighborhood kids turned into your breakfast, lunch and snacks over the past week. It’s only a matter of minutes before tiny ghosts, princesses and aliens ring your doorbell looking for a treat and you’re standing there empty-handed. Never fear! You’re Super Mom, able to find Halloween goodies in a single sweep of the house. Just get out a big bowl and fill it with your stash of extra baby stuff, like:

Candy cigars. We can’t think of a better way to get rid of all those leftover “It’s a Boy!” and “It’s a Girl!” bubblegum and chocolate cigars.

Teething biscuits. Wrap them up in cellophane and you’ve got biscotti for kids.

Travel packs of baby wipes. Hey, they may say that M&Ms melt in your mouth, not in your hands, but smart moms know otherwise.

Baby food. Tell your little Sponge Bobs and Captain Jack Sparrows that it’s actually special Halloween pudding.

Spare change. Dig deep into your diaper bag or junior’s piggy bank and rid yourself of all those pennies. Bonus for you: a lighter bag!