Monday, December 29, 2008

We Interrupt This Candy Moment to Bring You ...

The Great Turkey Escapade of 2008

Free-range, organic, grain-fed, antibiotic-free, raised-by-lesbian-farmers, 25-lb. turkey: $70
Box of stuffing, can of cranberry sauce, corn: $5
Bottle of champagne: $35
Sitting on my butt watching Mr. Goodbar try to figure out how to cook this thing: priceless.


Ms. Chops said... forgot something! Friends who butchered,cleaned, and plucked said turkey, brokered the turkey deal, and then coached said husband through cooking it: FREE! (or perhaps we are ex-friends now that you can't even stand the sight of turkey anymore.....)

Candy Yum Yum said...

That is true, my friend. Your involvement was invaluable. Now... can you procure for us some organic dark chocolate made by elves?

Ms. Chops said...

Christ, you really do want everything don't you? Well, if you insist- but the chocolate will be packaged by fair-trade tsunami survivors in a hand-knit organic bamboo-fiber bags made by free-range monkeys rescued from medical testing labs in East Asia.