No costume, no candy

This time of year, lots of candy statistics get tossed around. 35 million pounds of candy corn will be made this year. About one pound will be consumed in my house, one corn per day. The folks at Twix sent along some interesting tidbits to ponder.

According to their research, women prefer chewy treats more than men do (42 percent to 33 percent), while more men than women seek out treats with a crunch (33 percent to 23 percent). I don't know if I agree with that, but I did take a particular interest in the next statistic:

Nearly 7 out of 10 adults (69 percent) ages 18 to 24, and half of adults ages 25 to 34 said they would do it if they could. Trick-or-treating, that is. The only thing holding them back is dirty looks from the neighbors.

As I mentioned on my interview with The Sporkful, I love taking the Sugar Baby trick-or-treating. Heck, yes, I dressed him up when he was just a baby and strolled him around town looking for treats. I'm shameless that way, and so are many other parents. Sue me. 

I did mention, however, that I have a *special* bucket of leftover crap treats that I use for teenagers who call a baseball cap a costume. I freely admit that I've been known to clean out the pantry and collect all the granola bars, oatmeal packets, tea bags and raisin boxes that aren't going to be eaten and dole those out. I always thought that I was against trick-or-treating once you reached a certain age, say 17 or so. But the guys at The Sporkful made me realize that I'm not really an ageist, I'm a costumist. This was pretty revelatory to me. I feel empowered. So if you've got a costume, stop by my house on Halloween, even if you're 45 and don't have a kid in tow. I'll be giving out full-size Twix.

Ladies and Gents, the Moment I've Been Waiting For: Coconut Twix

Ever since I first learned that Twix was going to be releasing a coconut version, I've been obsessed. I was envisioning a stick-like version of a Girl Scout Samoa--cookie, toasted coconut, caramel and chocolate.
This week, a box arrived on my doorstep with some cool Twix swag and a single, solitary Twix Coconut bar.

Here's the deal. When I opened the package and took a whiff, there was no overwhelming coconut aroma like I expected there might be. I broke one of the fingers in half and looked for the coconut, but there wasn't any. Turns out, the caramel (or maybe the chocolate, but I think it's the caramel) is coconut flavored. I gotta say, I was kind of disappointed that there wasn't any real coconut in it. But it is what it is, which is a Twix with a twist. It was good. I enjoyed it and yes, I'd eat another one, but at the end of the day, I have to admit, I prefer the plain original version.

Jive talking

You might've heard about all the crazy snow we've been having up here in the Northeast. If memory serves me correctly, we've had five snow days since Martin Luther King, Jr. Day. Crazy. Yesterday I had 2 1/2 precious hours to myself while the Sugar Baby was in school, so I went to the spa went to Costco, the dollar store and, for some unknown reason, Aldi's. Well, actually I know the reason. I made a wrong turn and ended up in the Aldi parking lot and thought, what the heck. Let me just go in. I've decided that place completely and totally creeps me out, but they do have some interesting candy. (At least from what I could see, thanks to the woman who parked her cart right in front of all the chocolate and couldn't be bothered to move it. Harumph!) In any case, I found two things of note. The first was a Route 1 Jive bar: "Crunchy biscuit topped with caramel and a creamy milk chocolate coating." Uh oh, chocolate "coating." But since it was only 49 cents, I figured what the heck. I love the description on the back of the wrapper:
"Candy bars are loved by millions worldwide. With so many made every year, they could easily stretch right across the USA-- all along Route 66!" Um, what? The bar is called Route 1 but now they're talking about Route 66. To further confuse, it's made in Germany. I don't pretend to understand. As for the taste, it was very similar to a Twix, although ever so slightly larger. These weighed in at 2.1 oz., whereas a regular Twix is 2 oz.
When I eat a Twix, I like to pull part of the caramel off the top with my teeth to reveal the little holes in the cookie part underneath. You couldn't really do that with the Jive. The top layer of cookie came off onto the caramel, so I couldn't tell if there were holes in the cookie or not. All in all, though, this was a pretty good candy bar, even if it was chocolate "coating" and for 49 cents, it was a bargain.The other find was a Choceur "Deliciously Crispy Peanuts & Flakes" (Rich Milk Chocolate with Crunchy Peanuts and Cornflakes). Now, you know how I feel about Ritter Sport Cornflake. It is my favorite candy bar of all time. So I was nervous to try this. Frankly, I thought the peanuts wouldn't be a good addition. But I have to say, this is a damn good candy bar. The combination of peanuts and cornflakes gives it an almost peanut brittle-like taste. I still prefer the Ritter, but then I did the math. The Choceur was $1.99 for 7.05 oz., versus the Ritter which is $2.69 for 3.5 oz. Clearly the Choceur is the better choice. I just wish Aldi wasn't so creepy.

Breaking News: Twix Coconut on the Horizon

Oh yes, you read that right: in April, Mars will be launching a limited edition Twix coconut. Just when I thought I'd become immune to the excitement of new products, along comes this. I. Can't. Wait.

Guest Review: Vomit, Chalk and Chewy String

I sent the Wee von Schokolats a package of various candies from the assortment that I received from the NCA Sweets & Snacks Expo. This is stuff that I normally wouldn't eat, so I thought I'd let the experts do the talking on this one. Without further ado, a very honest review from Liesl von Schokolat:

The candy that we got was very interesting to say the least. The X-treme Sour candy tasted like vomit if you ignored the taste and chewed a bit longer it then tastes like cherry. The inside of the X-treme Sour is jelly and it is SOUR!!!
The Chocolate Necco Wafers were terrible-- they tasted like chalk. The only people who would like them is the people who are addicted to chalk. There is a very slight aftertaste of chocolate, but only I, Liesl, the chocohalic tasted it. LOL.
The Rips Whips were really good and fun to play with. Gretl made a bracelet with the candy and then ate it. She said that the candies did not taste good all together. The Baroness tried it and decided that they weren't worth the calories and spit it out. She said it tasted like chewy string with a cherry flavor. The Sour spray was very, very, very sour!!! It tasted like green apple and it made the Baron's tongue really dry. Warning: DO NOT SPRAY IN EYES.The Fini tennis balls were gums that were very sour at first, but didn't have a taste. It had a really stale texture with a weak sweet lemon flavor. It was like chewing on a slightly softer Gobstopper and it hurt our jaws to chew. The gum was very cute though.
Last but not least, the candy that I have recently eaten was a Triple Chocolate Twix bar. It was so good. It was like fudge on top of a yummy cookie. I loved it. The other Von Schoklats did not like it though, "too chocolatey" they said. Oh well they don't know what they are missing. :)

When Cookies and Chocolate Collide: Stix in the Mud and Twix Triple Chocolate

It was almost a year ago when I found a package of Funley's Stix in the Mud at a little grocery store in Vermont. They were little clusters of "cookie bits" covered in milk and dark chocolate. I had an e-mail exchange with the owner back then, but to be honest, I kind of forgot about them. Then, just a few days ago I received a package in the mail from Funley's, with samples of their original Stix, as well as their peanut butter and caramel varieties.
The clusters come individually wrapped in tent-style boxes. Some might balk at the individual wrapping but I love it. The box says, "Individually wrapped for self control," and you know what? That's exactly right. If these were just dumped in the box, I could probably eat the whole thing in one sitting. But this way, I can have one (or two) a night and be perfectly content.
I've found that I've been gravitating toward the caramel variety the most. Don't get me wrong; the peanut butter is good, but it has that same old problem that all peanut butter candies have: they can't compare to Reese's. But the caramel ones are very complex. If it were up to me, I wouldn't call the insides "cookie pieces," because they're much crispier than you'd think. They almost border on chip-style crispiness. These kind of remind me of something I had when I was a kid ... I think it was a Little Debbie product ... Cosmic something or others?
In any case, not only are these little patties yummy, but they're also all natural, with no trans fats or preservatives. A big hooray for that!
I have to give Funley's credit. These are definitely unique. I'm having a hard time trying to describe them (of course, that could just be because of the cough medicine with codeine that I'm nursing in an effort to get rid of this dang cold). You'll just have to try them for yourself and see what you think.
While I'm talking about cookies and chocolate, I should also mention that I finally tried a Twix Triple Chocolate bar. I had bought it in Maine when we were there for the Baroness' birthday, but we were so sugared out that we didn't have a chance to try this there.
In this Twix version, the cookie is chocolate and so is the caramel. I thought I'd love this, but I found myself just really wanting a good old plain Twix. Maybe there just wasn't enough contrast between the three tastes, or maybe it was that the texture of the cookie was different. Whatever the case, I'll stick with the original. Hopefully by tomorrow I'll be feeling a bit better so I can fill you in on the Candy Mystery that has popped up in my life. It's a story just rife with intrigue. You won't want to miss it.

Eating His Words?

From an e-mail from Mr. "I don't like candy" Goodbar:

This doesn't happen to me often, but I just had a 'bite sized' Twix and nearly fell over because it was so good. It was like an explosion of vanilla in my mouth supported by gritty crunch of the cookie. Very, very nice.

Snickers Adventure and Twix Java

It was looking like I was going to have some yummy days ahead of me, since I was finally able to get my mitts on both a Snickers Adventure bar and a Twix Java. Never have I been so disappointed. Well, okay, there was that one time when I was eight years old and the Ice Cube Queen took me to the kids' bingo night at church and I was really, really hoping to win the giant roll of insulation that someone had donated as a prize*, but this was a close second.
The Snickers Adventure bar is the latest tie-in for the new Indiana Jones movie (that, despite my better judgement, I'm actually looking forward to). The description on the wrapper says, "Rich chocolate. Crunchy nuts. And a cliffhanger kick of exotic spice and a hint of sweet coconut flavor." Well, boy howdee, that sounds good, doesn't it?
It's not.
Imagine if you will: you take an air-tight Tupperware container and put in a regular Snickers and an open bottle of Coppertone suntan lotion. You seal up the Tupperware and let it bake in the hot sun for a few months, thereby allowing the fake coconut aroma of the lotion to infiltrate the normally delicious Snickers. And voila! You have a Snickers Adventure.
Next, the Twix Java, which I've been sooo looking forward to. In fact, I contacted someone at Mars to find out where I could get one, because I haven't had any luck. The nice lady informed me that they're already being phased out, but I happened to stumble upon one. The caramel is coffee flavored and the cookie is chocolate, not vanilla. It was good. It was perfectly acceptable. But it wasn't the big "OMG!" I was hoping it would be. Frankly, I didn't think it had enough coffee flavor. So there you have it. A disappointing haul, but still better than listening to some other kid shout "BINGO!"

*As I was only eight years old, I had no idea what the insulation was, but it looked amazingly similar to cotton candy and it had a picture of the Pink Panther on the wrapping. You would think, however, that some thoughtful adult might've said, "Hey, I don't think any kids are going to want to win this insulation. Why don't we just donate it to the church and offer them a 25 cent candy bar instead?"

Random Candy Memory: Charleston Chews by the pool

Here's a lovely, summery candy memory from my friend Neil, who will probably be mortified that I'm writing this. But it's so cute, I had to do it.

We were talking about candy and the subject of Charleston Chews came up. "They remind me of being a kid," said Neil. He said he would go to the town pool and work up the courage to buy a frozen Charleston Chew from the hottie teenage girl in the bikini who worked at the snack shack. I can just picture him all moony-eyed with a cracking, pre-pubescent voice saying, "One Charleston Chew, please."

And then, like millions of other teenage boys, he'd take the frozen candy bar and thwack! it on the ground so that it broke up into a million pieces.

Good times. Good times.

This then got me thinking about the gender of candy. There are some candy bars that are just boy-oriented; fewer that are girly. Charleston Chews are definitely a boy candy, as are fireballs, jawbreakers and most other round candies. Twix are definitely boy-oriented, although probably just as many girls like them. 3 Musketeers are boy candy, as are Milky Ways. What do girls get? Stupid candy like Mary Janes, Bit o' Honeys and Necco wafers. I'll have to ponder this some more. What do you think?