Happy National Licorice Day!

Lordy, I don't know how things are where you live, but around here, the National Licorice Day festivities seem to still be carrying on. A parade just went by my house and the fireworks have just started. King Licorice 2010 has just been crowned and the world's largest black jelly bean has been unveiled.
Well, maybe that's a bit hyperbolic. Let's just say that I celebrated today by trying some Grapevines Purple Grape Twists in honor of this most important holiday. The cats over at American Licorice Company kindly sent me some samples of their grape-flavored twists. I have to admit, I wasn't too gung-ho on trying these, given the agitated state that Rainbow Twizzlers put me in a few years ago. I was afraid these would be another hot candy mess.The first thing I noticed when I opened the package was the aroma: big, juicy grape, like Bubble Yum. They get an A in the aroma category. As for taste, well, it's kind of baffling. Once you bite into a piece, it seems that the BIG taste isn't there. It's grapey, just not GRAPEY!
I think the biggest difference between Twizzlers and Red Vines (or in this case, Grapevines), is texture. While Twizzlers tend to be dense and chewy (at least the red and black kind), the Vines are more doughy. They're also more hollow, which created for me a very interesting situation. I found myself puffing into a piece and then drawing back in, almost as if it were a cigarette. It was kind of hypnotic; definitely a one-of-a-kind mouth-feel experience. I just don't know where to place these on the licorice continuum. I mean, if you're a purist, then these don't belong anywhere on the licorice charts. They'd be a candy all their own. But if you're more lax, and you like grape, then these could very well be a cult favorite. As a side note, Red Vines are holding a pretty cool contest where you can design their new label. You can check it out here.

Lamar Odom and No-Nuts: Candy Soulmates?

They say there's no such thing as coincidence, so what, dear Yumsters, does this mean?

The Ice Cube Queen sent me an article from some Florida newspaper about Lamar Odom's favorite candy. (In case you don't know--because I certainly didn't--he's a player for the Lakers.) Apparently he's a candy fiend and he's quoted as saying, "It's funny because the games I played well were the games where I ate candy for breakfast." Nice!

But here's the thing: his favorite candies are listed as Twizzlers, Gummi Bears, Hershey's Cookies & Cream, Life Savers and-- as he called them, "Peachy sugar-coated rings," (otherwise known as Peach O's). So, onto the freaky part:

Madame Yum Yum: "Hey No-Nuts, what's your favorite candy bar?"

No-Nuts: "Cookies & Cream."

MYY: "What's your favorite candy?"

No-Nuts: "Peach O's. Or Gummi Bears. And I like Twizzlers, too."

Dun-Dun-Dah! What could this mean? Does this mean that No-Nuts is really meant to be a professional basketball player? Or does it mean that Lamar Odom would make a successful college student majoring in math? What do you think?

F is for ...

Okay, you're gonna love this one.

Last night my friend's husband was out of town, so that of course means one thing and one thing only: brownies and a box of wine. Her kids were asleep by the time I pulled into her driveway, so we settled down in the "adult" living room (meaning no TV, no Barbie heads, no sticker remnants on the coffee table, etc.) and started talking each other down off a bridge about having to work until we're 80 because of the stupid stock market chit-chatting. So there we were, blah blah blah, when we see this car outside sloooowwwly driving by. Kind of weird since she lives on a dead end road. Then a few minutes later, another car comes and pauses in front of her house. Okay, kind of freaky, but whatever. So we get up and go into the kitchen to slice up the brownies.

There was the pan of brownies with three pieces of Twizzlers (green, brown and blue) in the center.

"What, pray tell, is that?" I asked her.

"This?" she said. "This is Will's undertaking. He thought if he put the Twizzlers into the brownies he could have both a brownie and candy for dessert. Then he made them into the shape of an "F" to stand for fire so that his father and sister wouldn't want to touch them (lest they get burned) and he could eat the whole thing."

Of course this had me rolling on the floor laughing and I begged her to get her camera to take a picture for the blog. She went into the living room to look for it and I hear her say, "What the hell is going on? There's another car outside."

I was still laughing when she said, "You didn't park in the road, did you?"

"In the road? No, I parked in the driveway," I say.

"Your car's in the middle of the road," she says.

I run to the window and-- holy crap!-- my car really is in the middle of the road. My freakin' Mini Cooper is in the middle of the freakin' road and there are cars driving around it!

Of course I was spazzing out, throwing on my shoes and jacket while at the same time completely mortified that I had to go out and move my car while people were watching. I ran out to it and there were two men standing at the end of the road.

"Why did you park your car in the middle of the road?" one of them asks.

"I forgot to put it in gear, Derfwad!" I said. (Well, I left off the Derfwad part.)

Fortunately, no harm came to the car, but I was good and freaked out. All I can say is, the "F" didn't deter me from attacking those brownies. And this, of course, proves without a doubt that Rainbow Twizzlers are pure evil.

When Life Gives You Twizzlers Rainbow Twists ...

... make candy mosaics!
In an ill-fated decision, both the Baroness and Memaw decided to purchase packages of Twizzler Rainbow Twists. They sure do look purty in all their prismatic beauty. But taste, well now, that's a whole 'nother story.

Even the Baron wouldn't eat them.

Yes indeed, these candies were so bad that, between a 10-year-old, a 13-year-old, the Baron and me, we couldn't get rid of these things. The texture was doughy, like paper mache, and the taste was just icky. We were clearly going to be stuck with ooodles of these things, so I wracked my brain trying to think of an art project and voila! Twizzler mosaics. Little Gretl and Liesel worked hard on these masterpieces. (Gotta love the "No Math" one!) If you decide to attempt a masterpiece of your own, just note that it's much easier to cut the Twizzlers with scissors rather than a knife.

Basset Hounds and Candy: Making the World a Better Place

I went to Bed, Bath and Beyond this morning to take advantage of the "Welcome to Your New Home-- Come Drop Lots of Cash Here!" coupon and in the parking lot I saw a couple standing by their car with the hatchback open and an old hound dog sitting there. Anyone who knows me knows that I go bonkers when I see a basset. None are ever quite as handsome as my beloved P.J. was, but I have a soft spot for all stinky dogs.
I went over and said, "Can I pet your dog?" and the couple said yes. Then the guy offered me a Twizzler. "Chocolate Twizzler?" he asked, holding out the bag. "They're new!" I didn't have the heart to tell them they weren't new, and he seemed to really be enjoying them. "They match your shirt," he said. "They're the 'Beyond' part of the store." They seemed like a really cool couple.
We had a lovely conversation and I got to scratch Vern behind his big floppy ears. Then I was off to the hair-pulling task of finding curtains for the livingroom.

Random Candy Wisdom

Taylor says:

"If you ever need a straw and you don't have one, bite the ends off a Twizzler and stick it in your drink."

Isn't it amazing how some candy experiences are so universal?

This moment in history

Here it is, folks ... my little man chomping on his very first piece of candy! I was working in the kitchen when I looked over into the play room and there was Henri, diving onto a Twizzler. He loved it, of course, but as he's still getting used to his new teeth, I thought it best if he didn't really eat the licorice. He got a good taste of it though.

Licorice Mix

I've always been a black licorice kind of girl. The cool kids-- the ones who liked caramel-- seemed to prefer red licorice, but that just never jazzed me. I always thought the red variety had a sort of Play Doh taste to it. Not that I'd ever turn it down, of course. When my friend Susan gets Twizzlers at the movie theater, I'll certainly have one or two. But I'd never buy it for myself. The other Sue in my life, the kick-ass firefighter garden guru, said she never liked red licorice. She felt like she was eating plastic.

I'm not that well-versed in the realm of red licorice, and until about college or so, I called it "lick-wish." Now that I'm older and wiser, I pronounce it the sophisticated way, "lick-o-rish." It seems there are two schools of thought in the red realm: Red Vines and Twizzlers. I didn't even know about Red Vines until about three years ago when I "met" my Australian candy pal, Debbie. She's a food writer, too, and we exchanged boxes of candy. She requested Red Vines, which I had never even heard of. She had developed a taste for them a few years back when she was living in California.

Anyhow, licorice seems to be playing a part in my life lately. I was at Trader Joe's the other day and I saw this guy in a business suit, standing in a long line, with only one item in his hands: a box of licorice Scotties. Now that's passion, I tell you. He was willing to wait in line in the middle of the day for his licorice fix.

This past weekend, I received a big ol' 5-lb. box of "Fresh From the Factory" red Twizzlers. These are all about texture. One of my dislikes of red licorice is that it can sometimes be way too hard to chew, but these fresh ones were so soft and pliable that they were actually pretty addicting. I can see a red licorice-lover plowing through a bin of these in no time. I, however, decided to share my bounty with the electrician who's been doing some work on my new casa.

"Help yourself to some candy," I said.

"Oh yeah, thanks. I already had some Twisters. I saw them and thought, 'Wow! Twisters! I haven't had those in years.'"

Um. Okay. I can see how you'd call them Twisters. But dude, they're Twizzlers! With two Zs! Ay-yi-yi.

But lest my tastebuds get too accommodated to the red variety, a bucket of Good & Plenty showed up just in time. This is the latest in the "Fresh From the Factory" line from Hershey's. I have to be totally honest here: the fresh idea was great with Reese's and Twizzlers. But for Good & Plenty? Eh, not so much. The appeal of G&P is the contrast of textures: crunchy candy shell, chewy licorice center. But in the fresh ones, the shell isn't crunchy enough. I almost want to take the lid off and expose them to the air for a while.

That's about all my licorice musings for today. I'd love to take an informal poll, though. Which is your favorite: red or black?

Yumtastic news!

I seriously have about ten thousand things I should be doing right now, but I had to stop and let you know about this new thing that Hershey's is doing because it sounds so yummy fantastic. You can order Reese's, Twizzlers, Good & Plenty and Pay Days hot off the factory conveyor belt. (Well, not hot because then you'd have melted candy, but you know what I mean.) They'll ship you a box of these goodies within 96 hours of them being made. This just gives the taste-tester in me goose bumps. How would super-fresh Reese's compare with a pack you buy at the grocery store? I'll let you know as soon as I find out. In the meantime, you can get more info at their website, www.hersheygifts.com.